Honour Cheer
by darkjewelledassassin
Summary: Cheer #4: In which Max falls back to his old ways after too much introspection. Warning: A little bit more angst than I had intended!
**Author's Note: I might be mistaken in this, but I don't think the DEO is run by the military. I'm rolling with that and since they are a secret organisation I've given them this day to celebrate. Also, I'm not American so I've based the gathering on what I've done in the past. A warning though: this one isn't exactly cheerful but I just couldn't get this out of my head. Don't worry whatever I do next will go back to the lightheartedness of the first few instalments (I hope!).**

 **Also, I wanted to say a massive thank you to the people who have commented and especially to those who were guests or not logged in. I couldn't reply to you but I read everything and appreciate it all!**

 **Again, unbeta'd so I apologise for mistakes.**

* * *

Alex stretched as she woke then relaxed back into her bed, smiling contentedly as she felt the warm sun on her face and heard her mother and sister moving about in the kitchen below her room. Her eyes opened slowly, taking in the pale pink walls and high ceilings of her childhood bedroom.

It was the smell of pancakes and waffles that eventually forced her out of bed. She plodded down the stairs and into the kitchen in search for food.

"Morning Alex!" Kara said brightly, giving her sister a kiss on the cheek.

"Good morning, sweetheart," her mother said. She placed a stack of pancakes on the table and turned back to the stovetop.

"Good morning," Alex replied to them both as she settled herself at the table. She eyed the pile of pans and pots on one bench and the ridiculous amount of grocery bags on the other. "Planning on feeding an army today, Mom?"

"Well, Kara is here," her mother teased.

"Hey!" Kara protested, already on her third pancake. Alex and Eliza laughed at her outraged face.

"I wasn't sure how many people would be coming and I didn't want anyone to go hungry," Eliza admitted.

"No chance of that," Alex reassured her as she started on her own stack. Without looking, she smacked Kara's hand away from where it was creeping towards Alex's plate. She ignored the grumbles of her sister and smirked into her food.

It was good to be home.

* * *

"Thank you for inviting us, Ma'am."

"Thanks for having us Mrs Danvers."

"This tastes amazing!"

The comments were following thick and fast as more and more people arrived at the Danvers house for their annual Armed Forces Day celebration. There were about 40 people so far and conversation, food and drink were flowing freely and easily. The atmosphere was cheerful and Eliza looked out from the kitchen towards the beach towards her adopted-for-a-day brood. She recognised a lot of the faces – there were those who Alex had brought in previous years who didn't have family of their own, those who were working far from home and couldn't get back to their family, and those who brought their own family to share in the comradery of the day.

Eliza was proud of her daughter. She looked after the people she cared about, making sure they knew they were welcome and her heart swelled as she noted all the happy faces.

A throat cleared behind her and she turned to see Maxwell Lord standing somewhat awkwardly in the kitchen.

"The door was open and Alex mentioned that there would be cake," Max said. He winced uncharacteristically as he heard the words come out of his mouth. Eliza laughed at him.

"Yes, there will be cake but only after I'm sure everyone has eaten their fill of proper food," she informed him with twinkling eyes. She sobered.

"Alex tells me that your parents passed away," Eliza said, with empathy. Max experienced a brief pang of annoyance towards the brunette agent. Eliza's sharp eyes noticed.

"She didn't tell me how, or when," Eliza assured him. "Just that you didn't have any close family so you would be joining us."

"I seem to be doing that a lot," Max muttered with a frown. "I'm not a very retrospective person," he said bluntly. "I don't even like one of your daughters."

Eliza laughed aloud at that. "Yes, I got that impression. Don't worry, she doesn't like you either so there's no need to pretend otherwise."

Max was oddly comforted by that statement.

"Alex, on the other hand, seems to go through stages of disliking and liking you," Eliza said casually as she brought out a tray of chocolate chunk cookies.

"We've had some disagreements on some matters of importance," Max replied vaguely.

"I gather those disagreements centre on Kara," Eliza stated, transferring the cookies to a wire rack for cooling.

"Yes," Max said unashamedly. "When she first arrived I saw her and others like her as a threat that needed to be counted."

Eliza didn't say anything for a while as she poured fresh pitchers of lemonade and cool water.

"I can see why you might have thought that," she eventually said. Max raised his eyebrows in surprise. Eliza smiled at him.

"They are powerful," she admitted. "It's humbling to realise that you could easily be wiped from existence if she forgets how strong she is or someone forces her to act against us."

Max looked up sharply at that but Eliza didn't seem to realise she'd hit on a truth.

"But that's also the reason we can't push them away. Kara was just 13 years old when she came to us. Did you know that? Imagine losing not only your entire family but your culture, your planet and everything you knew. Even the reason she was sent here was taken from her." Eliza shook her head in remembered sadness. "She was so young and, though heartbroken and afraid, had a light that shone brightly. If we hadn't taken her in, how long would that brightness have lasted? Would the pain of dealing with such loss have broken her, made her bitter and jaded? I'm glad her cousin brought her to us so we didn't have to find out."

Max stood there quietly, feeling the words that Eliza said about Kara Danvers could also be applied to him. If he had had the support of people like the Danvers, would he have turned out differently?

"There's something I want you to see," Eliza said, wiping her hands on a towel and walking out of the kitchen towards the gathered crowd. Max trailed after her, noting the frowns sent his way by those from the DEO and the curious glances by those who didn't know why the CEO of Lord Technologies would be there.

Eliza lead him over to a board full of photos and pieces of paper with names written on them. It was set up next to the food table where everyone could see it.

"These are the people who can't be here with us today," Eliza said softly, reaching out to touch a photo of Jeremiah Danvers that had been pinned at the centre of the board. "Families and friends, those we've lost, or even just those who drew the short straw and had to work. They are with us in spirit and we honour those who have given their lives." She stepped away. "If you have a photo of your parents, you're welcome to pin it up. If not, there is paper on the table to write their names." She touched his shoulder as she walked away.

Max stood frozen, taking in the board and what it meant. It reached his heart, this simple yet poignant act. A joining together of people with a common story of love, loss and laughter. He could take this step and become a part of it, at least for this day.

He didn't know if he could do it.

It had been just him for so long he was afraid of letting go of his carefully crafted protection. He had suffered an extraordinary loss already and he didn't want to feel such pain again.

But his parents deserved to be on that board. They deserved to be remembered.

Slowly, he pulled out his wallet and removed the small photo within. A man and a woman and a young Max smiled out from it. The older Max stared down at the worn photo for a moment before grabbing a pin and placing it on the board.

He smiled wryly as he brushed his thumb over the happy smile of his younger self. It was only fitting he mourned the bright young boy he had once been as well.

He spun about suddenly and strode back into the house and out the front door. He was tired of the introspection and the self-analysis. He needed to not think, to get back to the charming, arrogant, confident man he had been before…

' _Before I allowed the Danvers family to let me believe I could belong again_.'

* * *

A pair of dark brown eyes watched the struggle unfolding in front of the board and tracked Max as he strode away, unaware that his face showed his anguish.

Alex wasn't sure what to think. He had come, pinned his parents photo to the Board of Remembrance, then strode away like he was angry at the world again.

Like the Maxwell Lord he was when they first met.

"I can't believe I'm going to say this," Kara said as she came up beside Alex and wrapped an arm around her sister's waist. "But I kind of feel sorry for him."

Alex smiled at her fondly. "That's because you're a good person with a big heart."

"And so are you," Kara responded seriously. "I thought Max was only an arrogant, evil, manipulative man when we first met – "

"Which he was," Alex pointed out in all fairness. Kara grinned before continuing.

"And I still believe he is all that. Except for evil. Don't get me wrong, some of the things he's done have been absolutely sickening and wrong but I can't fault his reasoning."

"Kara, he tried to kill you!" Alex hissed quietly. There were too many people around to rage aloud like she wanted.

"Yes he did. But he wasn't wrong in his reasoning – just look at Non. And Astra. They were a threat. I don't like him – I probably never will – but he's changed." She paused then lightened the mood. "I don't think he wants to kill me anymore. That's an improvement."

Alex huffed out a laugh and squeezed her sister, heart full of awe and love for this woman who had such compassion.

"It is definitely an improvement," Alex agreed. She spied her mother walking carefully down the stairs of the porch and crossing towards the table, hands balancing a large, three-tiered chocolate cake. She tugged her sister towards the table.

"If we want any cake, we'd better get there first."

* * *

Max drove well above the speed limit on the way back to National City. He enjoyed the freedom the drive afforded him, letting his mind linger on nothing but the feel of the car and how it handled on the roads.

He made it back to Lord Technologies far quicker than he wanted and went to his private lab to lose himself in the intricacies of physics and chemistry. He managed a solid few hours of work, but it didn't afford him the release it usually did. His parents face hovered in his mind's eye. Their laughter and love had sheltered him from the horrors the world could bestow and their deaths had ripped that protection away. He had spent many years rebuilding a wall that could protect him once again.

"Enough!" he yelled as he threw the small bundle of wires against the wall in frustration.

"Talking to yourself can be hazardous to your health," Alex said from the doorway. "You can talk yourself into anything that way. Trust me, I know."

"I see you still have no idea of the concept of knocking," Max retorted as he rounded his desk to sit down behind it. "What can I do for you, Agent Danvers?"

Alex studied his face. His tone was disinterested and he wore the charming smirk that he used on everyone to tell them he was smarter. It irked her but she kept her temper in check.

"I saw you at mom's," she said, stepping inside and crossing the room. She put a plate down on the desk in front of him. "You left before dessert so I brought you some."

"Thank you," he said politely, ignoring the cake and turning to his computer.

"And I wanted to return this," Alex said softly, sliding the photo of his parents across. Her fingers lingered on it. "It's customary to take back whatever you put on the board. I didn't know whether you had another copy and I didn't want you to lose what you had."

"Thank you," he said, softer and more genuine this time. A hand covered the photo protectively and he slid it into his pocket.

"Please pass along my apologies to your mother," he said formerly. "I didn't get the opportunity to thank her."

"I will," Alex promised. She stood there awkwardly, not quite wanting to leave until she'd broken through that façade of cool disinterest that had reappeared.

"Was there anything else?" Max asked after a moment, glancing up from his computer.

"I guess not," Alex replied with a tinge of sadness. Max nodded.

"Then goodnight, Agent Danvers."

She hesitated for a moment before replying and leaving the man to his work.

"Goodnight, Max."

* * *

 **This had far more angst than I intended for these instalments. Hell, I didn't even plan to have them connected! Fic muses have a habit of getting their own way though. I hope next one is cheerier *pokes muse and feeds her chocolate***


End file.
